Wandering Through Vol. 1 Chapter 23 - First Life 02 🔞

The days when I was a harbinger of things are long gone.

 

Leegwang didn’t understand the way things were back then. The prince of the land treated his wife as if it were the most precious thing in the world.

 

The word ‘cherished’ was not wasted. Perhaps even a newborn baby would not have been handled with such care.

 

The slightest breeze would make him restless, the slightest walk would make him fidget.

 

This was true even at night.

 

The prince lusted after his queen, but he didn’t often thrust his shaft under her.

 

Even though they kissed and cuddled every night.

 

When it seemed unbearable, he would comfort himself by holding her as she slept, but he never touched her unless she wanted him to.

 

Maybe it was because she came in early.

 

All I remember is that I gave her gold and jade, day and night.

 

I remember thinking, ‘It was good to just look her in the eye. Looking back now, I realize how stupid that was.’

 

If eye contact was good enough, how much better would it be to do more?

 

He didn’t understand the prince.

 

In fact, he didn’t really want to understand it anymore. If he did understand it, he would have to be at the mercy of Yiseo’s every move, and he didn’t want that.

 

He liked to leave his mark on her body, a red handprint from the shape he held, a gnash of teeth from the way he bit.

 

Those deep bites, it was hard to tell if they were from a fall or a bite from him.

 

So sometimes, on impulse, I would bite deeply, but when I heard her scream, I would quickly regain my composure and lick the bite. 

 

It meant I wouldn’t bite anymore, but it made her nervous because it felt like an animal testing its prey.

 

He didn’t bother to explain his behavior, as her eyes, which had been dazed, stared back at him with such clarity.

 

The anxiety and fear in her eyes were palpable, but it didn’t matter.

 

She was looking at him anyway, so it didn’t matter.

 

“Uh, please, get rid of it…”

 

Yiseo echoed her plea.

 

“Isn’t this the prince you love? Isn’t it nice to hold him in your arms and kiss him after so long?”

 

True to his word, the entity in the form of the prince embraced Yiseo and slowly pressed his lips to her cheek and the nape of her neck. 

 

He didn’t seem to be lusting after her, but more like he was enjoying her company.

 

She tried to push him away, but it didn’t work.

 

It wasn’t a person in the first place, so it had no existence. It was just a replay of a time in its past life.

 

If someone pointed at a painting of a tiger eating a man and yelled at it to stop, would it change?

 

That form was like that painting. No matter what Yiseo did now, there was no way it would react.

 

“Ah…”

 

The hand of the entity in the form of the prince grabbed Yiseo’s stomach. 

 

For the first time in her life, her body froze as she tried to break free. 

 

The careful hand continued to rub her stomach, and she didn’t push away the cold, almost freezing touch.

 

Out of the corner of his eye, he observed her expression. She looked like she was about to cry, but she didn’t.

 

Perhaps she was remembering when she was pregnant in her previous life. The prince of the previous life used to massage her growing belly out of habit.

 

Later, he would slip his hand through her clothes and caress her bare skin, and she would be embarrassed at first, but later she would part her clothes to allow his hand to enter.

 

He would then spend a long time touching her belly, whispering in her ear about what kind of child she would have, who it would look like, and so on.

 

It seemed like a good time, a long time ago.

 

Yiseo smiled faintly. And then she placed her hand on the back of the form’s hand. He didn’t hold her hand, just patted the back of it a couple of times, that’s all.

 

That little gesture.

 

“—Ah!”

 

He snatched her up and pulled her into his arms. 

 

Red marks marred the frail flesh that couldn’t withstand his rough pull. He grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him.

 

“Why.”

 

In her face, he searched for the things he’d seen earlier. The compassion, the longing, the affection underneath.

 

“Why…”

 

The things he deserved, the things she wouldn’t give him.

 

“Is it because of the child? If you were pregnant with my child, even now, would you look at me like that…”

 

Asking her if she would look at him like that felt like begging. 

 

‘She had to be the one begging. It had to be her, all the clinging, all the begging,’ he thought.

 

“Twas the child of the Great Lord.”

 

Yiseo mocked briefly, a laugh, but still, he couldn’t tear his gaze away from her twisted mouth.

 

“You know I am not built to bear children.”

 

“Maybe if I pour my heart into your belly until I get inside.”

 

“I don’t want to.”

 

She pushed his hand away, glanced back at the entity with bitter eyes, and slipped out of his arms. 

 

Covering herself with the quilt that had fallen to the floor, she pushed herself up. 

 

He grabbed her ankle as she struggled to her feet, and she was instantly pinned down.

 

Even though he hadn’t done anything, just grabbed her.

 

‘This is a body that can’t escape.’ 

 

With that thought, the raging inside calmed down a bit.

 

“In a previous life, didn’t you want a child from the prince?”

 

“I never wanted it, it was just that that was the life that the maiden was supposed to have: to meet a man, have a child, and die as soon as she gave birth.”

 

“…You knew you were going to die? Ah. So you begged him to live, to wait, and he died because that was the way it was meant to be.”

 

So now she could say she doesn’t love him, because that’s not a given. So if she never really loved him in the first place, from the beginning, all her life.

 

“Now that I think about it, I doubt that the maiden really loved him. Maybe it was just ‘meant to be’ for her.”

 

He pulled her into his arms. 

 

Something in his head felt a little off. He wasn’t quite sure what he was saying or how he was moving. 

 

Sitting her on my thighs, I hugged her tightly behind her back, making sure she couldn’t go anywhere. Kissing the back of her neck, rubbing her stomach.

 

She didn’t stroke the back of his hand.

 

When he tried to run his hand down her stomach and grope her inner thigh, she quickly grabbed the back of his hand.

 

‘Why do you have to make me do this when you could have just held my hand?’

 

Her touch was feeble as she pushed him away, but he didn’t let it stop him, groping beneath her and whispering, 

 

“It’s a good thing the prince doesn’t know. If he did, he would have ended up like me.”

 

He sneered at the entity sitting across from him. 

 

A man who knew nothing and died believing she would have loved him all his life.

 

💫

 

In the candlelit shrine, candles flickered and shadows flitted around in the panting breathing.

 

“Agh, aah, ugh…”

 

The dragon in the painting, now faded and ruined beyond recognition, and the old shrine maiden falling before him.

 

The man was clinging to the back of her limp body, his arms wrapped around her so tightly that she could neither lie down nor lie face down, but could barely stand on her knees. 

 

Actually, it was more accurate to say she was being held by the man’s arms than standing.

 

“Hmph, ah, haah!”

 

The thick shaft of flesh slipped in and out of her bottom. Her breath caught in her throat with each thrust, but if she lurched forward even a little, a large hand clamped down on her pelvis.

 

“…!”

 

She could barely open her mouth to breathe as the thrusts drove deeper.

 

The man sucking on the nape of her neck grabbed her chin and turned her head. He slipped his tongue between her parted lips and swallowed her faintest breath, causing her to gasp and struggle.

 

“Ha…!”

 

Her nails scraped across the back of his hand as he shuddered, enjoying the feeling of her flesh tightening around his member.

 

The faintly bloody cut was so small he wouldn’t have known it was there unless he looked closely, but it wasn’t the size of the wound that mattered to him. 

 

It was the fact that she had hurt him.

 

That she’d hurt him enough to try to get away from him.

 

“Did you hate kissing me that much?”

 

He asked, releasing their overlapping lips, and all she could do was gasp through unfocused eyes. 

 

When she looked like she was about to pass out from lack of breath, he slipped a finger inside her lips and parted them. 

 

Saliva trickled down the side of her mouth, but her breathing returned. He kissed the nape of her neck as she gasped for air, and then released his hold, her body slumping forward into the embrace of the entity before them.

 

“If you don’t like it, I’ll change it.”

 

“No.”

 

The shape of a prince swallowed her lips. Her tiny body was now dwarfed by the bulk of the men.

 

Still, the dragon did not save her.