To My First Love, With Regret (Libenia) Chapter 23

He took Eve back to White Cliff Hall and returned home — but by then, a full hour had passed.

“Damn…”

Ethan, who’d climbed in through the window just as he’d left, cursed softly at the red stains on the carpet. He hastily grabbed the half-finished whiskey from the table.

When he poured the amber liquid over the stain, a nauseating smell rose. He grabbed a handkerchief and started rubbing — but the red didn’t disappear so much as spread, turning brown.

This unstainable stain was just like him — having done something irreversible. Staring at it, Ethan asked himself:

Did I do the right thing? I never thought I’d go this far — even if it was for us.

He dragged his hands down his face and stood up. From beyond the wall — from the bathroom — came the sound of running water. He needed to wash up too, but instead he paced the room nervously, running the irreversible over and over in his mind.

If I get caught — the duke will try to kill me.

In that moment, as if he’d made a decision, he headed to the closet. He pulled out the travel bag he’d thought he wouldn’t need to look for another two months.

Ethan had always laughed at the phrase “love getaway,” thinking it was stupid. But now — running away was his only salvation.

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The next day, Ethan set out before the sea fog had lifted.

First stop — the train station.

“Please take care of Becky.”

He shook Tom’s hand.

“I’ll be in touch.”

Hugging Becky — who in just one day had grown haggard from the stress — he put them on the train that would carry them away in the opposite direction from the coastline.

Once they’d left, he drove out of Cliffhaven. With Eve.

By the time they reached the port city two hours away — the banks were open.

Ethan cashed the check he’d received from the Crown Prince of Rosenholm. The lighthouse repair costs had been fully covered by the duke’s family, so this was essentially Ethan’s share.

Eve transferred all the remaining money in her account to a secret account and withdrew cash for travel expenses.

Eve — I don’t need your money.

Male pride rose in his throat — but he didn’t say it. It was ridiculous for a thief trying to steal someone else’s fortune to flaunt pride over money.

Besides — the money conned from the Crown Prince of Rosenholm had another purpose.

Next stop — the passenger port. They bought tickets for the ferry to Lavinia — across the sea. The clerk behind the glass asked:

“What class would you like?”

Ethan’s pride burst out anyway.

“First class—”

“No — second class,” Eve interrupted from behind him.

“I have enough money.”

“I know. But it’s only a three-hour trip. No point wasting money.”

Wasting money? You?..

The words from Eve’s lips stung worse than the duke’s golf club strikes.

She’d lived her entire life not knowing what “wasting money” meant. But the moment this lady found herself in a poor man’s arms — she learned that feeling instantly.

What have I done to you?

Something hot surged inside Ethan.

He wouldn’t wait for the duke’s wealth to come to him. After graduation, he’d find a good job — so those precious lips would never say “wasting money” again.

When Eve was the unreachable sun — he’d wanted to possess her, even if it meant dragging her down to the earth he walked on.

Now that she was in his arms — he wanted her to shine forever.

In his arms, of course.

Heading toward border control, Ethan gripped two one-way tickets in his hand — not knowing if they led to heaven or hell.

Like that time on the cliff — grabbing a tree root, not knowing if it would save him or kill him. That had happened when he was a child, after a reckless dare with Harry — hanging bare-handed from the middle of a chalk cliff.

Now — with his other hand — Ethan held tight to the woman who whispered either salvation or ruin.

I don’t want to accept the reality that the woman I love is the twin of the man I hate. But I can’t deny they share the same blood.

At least judging by their impatient, fearless natures.

Arranging a “love getaway” at sunrise had been Eve’s idea.

“We’ll get married, have a baby — then go to my father. He won’t be able to refuse to acknowledge us or help — if only to protect his reputation.”

How could he separate his already-married, already-pregnant daughter? In this world, making her a divorcee with baggage would be an even bigger stain on his reputation. But he couldn’t become a duke whose daughter lived in a moldy rented room either.

So the Duke of Kentrell would have to acknowledge the criminal’s offspring he so despised as family.

Just thinking about it made Ethan feel his old grievances melt away.

His only worry was his grandfather — suddenly left all alone.

“Don’t worry about me. I’m still in shape — I climb the lighthouse every day without trouble.”

He knew his grandfather was strong — a man who’d weathered decades of storms with the lighthouse he protected. Ethan worried about the loneliness that would inevitably come once the family scattered. But he believed his friends — the sea and the lighthouse — would chase that loneliness away too.

Actually — that wasn’t his only worry.

“I made arrangements with friends from university — we’re traveling across the country.”

He couldn’t tell the truth.

The Captain would surely oppose Ethan’s plan — call it wrong. Then he’d have to go back to a life of enduring the duke family’s attacks.

It would be bad if the duke realized Ethan had run off with Eve and started interrogating his grandfather about where they’d gone.

They can’t catch us — not until Eve has the baby.

“Passports, please.”

They reached the border control desk. The officer took Ethan’s passport and stared at him. Those ten seconds felt like an eternity.

He clenched his fists hard to hide his sweaty palms. His heart felt like it had jumped into his throat. So this is how a fugitive feels.

Thump.

A stamp went into the passport.

“Safe travels.”

Why was he so nervous? They couldn’t have found out and barred him from leaving that fast.

The relief of getting through border control without trouble was short-lived. What if they ran into someone they knew? Eve covered her face with a scarf and sunglasses. Even so, she couldn’t sit still in the waiting area — she paced outside until they boarded the ferry to Lavinia.

The ship bid farewell to Mercia with a long horn blast and set sail. Ethan stood with Eve on the aft deck, watching their homeland recede.

The grayish city blurred as if in sea fog — then sank below the horizon. Before their eyes remained only the dark blue sea swallowing white foam — and the ash-gray sky.

I actually did this.

The first feeling wasn’t joy at accomplishment — but the awareness that there was no turning back. It was the fear only someone who’d staked their entire life on this escape could feel.

“We’re finally free.”

But Eve — seemingly in a different position — was simply happy. Only when she kissed him passionately did the elation pass to Ethan — and his heart began to race.

No one’s chasing us. We’re free.

He looked around — reaching into his jacket’s inner pocket. The people admiring the view had lost interest in the unchanging scenery and gone to their cabins — leaving the deck empty. Eve started to leave too — but Ethan blocked her path.

“What?”

Her surprised gaze followed him down. Following the man dropping to one knee.

In that moment — Eve smiled so wide she had to cover her mouth with her hand. She was surprised by the ring box Ethan produced.

“You got a ring overnight?”

“No — I’ve had it ready for ten years.”

It was his late grandmother’s engagement ring. His grandfather had passed it to Ethan — telling him to give it to the woman he decided to marry. Ethan admitted this honestly, and as if making excuses, added a reason:

“They were the most perfect couple I’ve ever known. Their life wasn’t always peaceful — but they loved and relied only on each other — and that’s why they were happy every single day. I want us to be that kind of couple.”

That’s why he confidently said he’d prepared it as a lucky charm — but deep down, he was ashamed.

A design that had been popular fifty years ago. At best — classic. Honestly — outdated. No diamond, nothing fashionable these days — it didn’t even compare to what Becky had received.

I was going to earn money and buy one — but I didn’t think I’d be proposing in just a few days. Damn…

He didn’t want to insult his grandfather. Back then, this ring must have been the most beautiful and expensive one you could get. But that was fifty years ago.

Grandfather had polished this ring every chance he got — even after Grandma died. The only consolation was that it hadn’t lost its luster.

Of course — the biggest consolation was Eve’s radiant smile, which didn’t waver even when he opened the ring box. If she’d shown even a hint of disappointment, Ethan — before even saying “marry me” — would have apologized, and the only proposal of his life would have turned into a nightmare.

But Eve seemed simply to be enjoying the moment — smiling as she waited for his next words.

Ethan — as if going through the formalities — straightened his clothes, his hair, then cleared his throat, took a deep breath — and finally spoke the words his beloved had been waiting for.