KISS THE SCUMBAG Chapter 18

Yujin, who had turned his head following that subtle gesture, moved hesitantly. He felt slighted at the thought of being ordered around like this, but he couldn’t just stand there forever. Hadn’t he promised himself he would accept any proposal? How did he expect to resolve this situation if he couldn’t even do something this small? His own feelings were a trivial matter compared to his current plight.

No more mistakes. Absolutely not.

He coached himself. He had to adapt to the situation as rationally and calmly as possible. It wasn’t as if Winston would make unreasonable demands; after all, they were both in a tight spot because of the will. He could afford to put up with Winston teasing him a little.

Yujin sat back down in the wingback chair he had occupied during the reading of the will, straightened his back, and fixed his gaze on Winston. Winston narrowed his eyes, watching Yujin settle into the very seat where he had imagined humiliating him.

The scent of pheromones, which naturally permeated the surroundings, thickened significantly. Even Winston noticed it, yet Yujin remained strangely unresponsive. Suppressing his irritation, Winston pushed himself off the desk he had been leaning against and asked, “Tea is fine, right?”

“Ah, yeah….”

Before Yujin could even finish answering, Winston was already reaching for the pot sitting on the desk. He lifted the tea cozy that covered it, poured the still-hot tea—which had been brought not long ago—directly into a cup, and picked up the bottle of brandy sitting beside it. Ah, Yujin opened his mouth to say something, but closed it just as quickly.

Maybe it would be better to drink.

He knew this was a situation that required a clear head, but with his nerves frayed and raw, he figured it might be better to ease the tension rather than suffer through a migraine. A couple of drops of brandy wouldn’t exactly be a large amount, would it?

Yujin watched as Winston added a spoonful of honey and stirred the tea lightly to finish it.

Thump…

Suddenly, Winston began to walk. The rhythmic sound of shoe heels echoed across the herringbone floorboards. One step, then another. Watching Winston draw closer and closer to him, accompanied by the chilling sound of footsteps ringing through the quiet study, Yujin tensed up and hunched his shoulders. He was holding his breath and pressing his body against the chair as if to merge with it when Winston stopped.

Ah.

Winston stood with his back to the only exit, looking down at him. Yujin’s complexion paled as he realized his escape route was blocked. His anxious gaze kept darting behind Winston, but Winston, pretending not to notice at all, handed him the teacup with a nonchalant expression.

“Here.”

Winston’s demeanor was entirely composed, yet Yujin’s mouth went bone-dry regardless.

“Th-thanks.”

Yujin took the cup, along with the saucer, with both hands. He opened his mouth to speak, but his voice cracked horribly, forcing him to clear his throat in a hurry. Winston watched in silence as Yujin lowered his gaze, sipped the tea, and moistened his throat.

“How’s the flavor?”

“…It’s good.”

Yujin answered cautiously to Winston’s query. Silence fell once more. What is he thinking? The lack of any discernible emotion on Winston’s expressionless face only made Yujin more anxious.

Slurp….

Perhaps because his entire focus was on Winston, he accidentally made a noise while drinking the tea. Embarrassed by the unpleasant sound echoing through the quiet room, Yujin hurriedly placed the cup back on his lap.

He felt pathetic, flustered and not knowing what to do. Why am I like this? I’m not a teenager anymore, get a grip!

How am I supposed to protect Angie if I’m like this?

After reprimanding himself harshly, Yujin took a deep breath and opened his mouth. He was determined to bring up the matter himself if this was how Winston was going to play it.

“Hey.”

“How is it living here?”

Winston asked at almost the same time. Startled, Yujin was left speechless; he hesitated before reluctantly answering.

“It’s fine. But….”

“I’m glad. If there’s anything uncomfortable, just say so; I’ll accommodate you as much as I can.”

He had tried to interject his own question, but his opportunity had been snatched away once again. To Yujin, who looked at him in bewilderment, Winston continued without a care:

“As long as it’s not that you want to go back to where you used to live.”

At those words, Yujin realized that the “here” Winston had mentioned didn’t mean the entire Delight estate, but rather that old annex.

“…I don’t have thoughts like that.”

It was true that his current living quarters were far from comfortable, but he hadn’t paid much mind to it. He hadn’t expected to stay here this long, after all.

He had expected that once he got even a small amount of money after hearing the contents of the will, he would leave immediately.

Bitterness and anxiety swirled within him.

“It wasn’t my house anyway….”

His voice trailed off as he bowed his head. This is why I didn’t want to come back. There were too many memories here. The happy past hurt his heart even more than the painful and humiliating ones. He had so few happy memories that those meager moments were incredibly precious, and because of that, he couldn’t bear to forget them.

Memories of the past, arriving unbidden, made Yujin weak. He hesitated before carefully speaking.

“…Who lives there now?”

He asked the question without being able to lift his head, and Winston answered in a dry tone.

“No one.”

Yujin slowly raised his hesitant gaze.

“No one lives there…?”

He could hear the slight tremor in his own voice. As his voice faded away without confidence, Winston spoke.

“Right. That place hasn’t been used for a long time.”

“…I see.”

Yujin had nothing more to say, so he fell silent. The past he had carefully buried was revived so easily by even the smallest trigger. He felt dizzy, and it was as if the laughter of that day was faintly echoing in his ears.

Those brilliant days that had, for a moment, allowed him to imagine a different future.

All of which had been a delusion.

“…So you didn’t go there either.”

Yujin muttered as if to himself. How terrified and lonely he had been, all by himself in that annex that no one visited. After he had come to find him one day, Yujin’s life had changed completely. He had thought he would live and die all alone.

To think I would miss that lonely annex now.

The boyish face of a youth laughing brightly overlapped with the fully grown adult male. Lost in his distant memories, Yujin became dazed, pondering the hollow phantom images.

Yujin.

Suddenly, a cheerful, laughter-filled voice vividly returned to him. Even the soft kisses and sweet whispers.

I love you.

…Ah.

Yujin unconsciously narrowed his eyes and let out a sigh. Winston was standing just two or three steps away, looking down at Yujin. Sitting down, looking up at him, the man who was over two meters tall seemed too high up to reach. While he tilted his head back as far as he could to look up at him, a strange emotion, accompanied by an uncomfortable tension, began to emerge.

What if I hadn’t met this man?

The imagination he had dwelled on time and again resurfaced in his head. If that had been the case….

Suddenly, Winston moved. Standing at that close distance, he spread his arms wide and gripped the armrests of the armchair Yujin was sitting in.

If that had been the case, we….

Without taking his eyes off Yujin’s, Winston spoke.

“Sweetheart.”

His heart trembled violently, as if in spasms, at the low, resonant voice. Although their distance had closed enough to feel each other’s breath, Yujin couldn’t move at all. As if under a spell, he could only blinklessly stare at him. It felt like their lips were about to touch at any second. Just like that day, under that scorching sun.

If so, then I….

As he held his breath, his long eyelashes trembling faintly, Winston whispered tenderly:

“Did you think that if you seduced me by bringing up the past, I’d get all worked up and ravage you right here?”