Foot Worship Chapter 31

Goo Jihoon’s face was flickering—sometimes it was two, sometimes it was three—it was chaotic. Even when I closed my eyes tightly and opened them again, my vision was dizzy. I scratched hard under my chin with my hand and picked up the drinking glass. I winced intensely at the strong liquor that scorched my esophagus and hurriedly looked for water.

“Park Beomjin, stop drinking. You’re drunk.”

“I’m fine. Give me more.”

“What did you say this morning? You said you’d be a dog if you drank again.”

“Woof woof. Arf arf. Bow-wow.”

“You’re such an ass. Seriously.”

I pushed myself up and grabbed Goo Jihoon’s face—which kept blurring my vision—with both hands to hold it steady. Goo Jihoon struggled, trying to push my hands away in disgust.

Only after being hit hard on the forearm did I let go and collapse back onto the sofa. I pulled over a cigarette that was lying haphazardly on the table, put it in my mouth, and lit it. Resting my chin on one arm, I exhaled a long, heavy puff of smoke mixed with a sigh. It felt like the events of that day became clearer the more intoxicated I got.

That day, I tossed aside my pride and everything else and clung to Jerome. I begged and pleaded, even to the point of being pathetic, but Jerome did not reverse his decision.

“Mister, I shouldn’t have talked about the halo. It’s so embarrassing.”

“Why do things that are embarrassing?”

“Pour some water into a plate for me. So I can shove my head in and die.”

“Forget it. Does anything change by keep thinking about it?”

“…”

“To be brutally honest, you didn’t do anything right. Your state was so dog-awful that the Dom had to end the scene by using the safe word himself.”

I don’t know why Goo Jihoon is only saying things that hit the mark today. No matter how many times I thought about that day, it was a hundred percent my fault. I would have thought that ending the relationship was the right thing to do if I were him, too. If I had only given him a heads-up beforehand that I get severely nervous—or, no, if I had just said during the scene that I felt like I had indigestion—things wouldn’t have come to this point.

The reason Jerome kept long intervals between scenes was to have plenty of conversation. I definitely had the opportunity to speak, but I was the one who ruined it like a dog. Everything from start to finish was my fault. That was why I couldn’t even try to hold onto him again.

“I got a message that Director Kwon is arriving soon.”

“I’m going to leave.”

“Leave? Where are you going? Kwon Raewon told me to keep you pinned down so you can’t run away.”

Kwon Raewon had just returned to the country earlier and was on his way here straight from the airport. I tilted the bottle to fill my glass and poured it down my throat. Even insults felt less impactful when I was drunk. I was so intoxicated that my face felt hot. As I was touching my cheeks and pushing myself up to go to the restroom, the door swung open, and Kwon Raewon appeared.

Caught awkwardly standing there, I made eye contact with Kwon Raewon and waved my hand with an awkward smile. His gaze was not just fierce; it was icy. Kwon Raewon threw his jacket onto the sofa, poured beer into a glass, and emptied it in one go.

“Park Beomjin.”

“…Why.”

“Come here.”

I let my eyebrows sag and pouted my lips. If I followed my heart, I would want to protest, ‘If a friend is going through a breakup, you shouldn’t be getting this angry, even if you can’t comfort me!’ but I knew for a fact that if I said one wrong word here, I wouldn’t even be able to save my bones.

As the distance closed, Kwon Raewon grabbed my wrist, spun me around, and pushed me against the wall. In an instant, I was pinned against the wall with both arms subdued. With one hand, he gripped both of my hands, and with the other, he pressed down on the back of my neck.

“Hey, you bastard, are you bird-brained? Why can’t you understand when I tell you once? I told you to stop calling because I was at work.”

“…It hurts, it hurts. And I have a headache because I’m drunk.”

“Are you proud of being dumped? Did I hold a ritual for you to get dumped? Why are you taking your anger out on an innocent person? Do you have any idea how many important calls I missed because your calls were coming in, or not?”

“I’m sorry. I won’t, I won’t do it again.”

My tongue was tied from the alcohol so the words didn’t come out well, but I forced myself to finish the sentence. Kwon Raewon muttered a small curse and released me. It felt like I heard him say, ‘What conversation could I possibly have with a drunk person?’ My vision was spinning, so I stayed plastered to the wall for a while.

These days, I had been taking out the aftereffects of being dumped by Jerome by bothering Kwon Raewon and Goo Jihoon. Goo Jihoon had been called out for the third day in a row to be my drinking buddy, and Kwon Raewon had been worn out from taking my calls as I whined while drunk. They were grateful guys who would come when called and answer when I rang, even while cursing me out as much as they could.

I glanced at Kwon Raewon, then staggered out. I stood with my back to the door and rubbed the wrist he had grabbed. There were red handprints left behind from how hard he had squeezed. Clutching my head, which was dizzy from the alcohol, I walked toward the restroom. For some reason, the jazz music playing in the shop sounded particularly sweet today.

As I opened the restroom door, I suddenly remembered the day I accidentally ran into Jerome. My stomach ached as I thought of Jerome, who had worried about me in a sweet voice and gently stroked the back of my head. Come to think of it, Jerome had said he was a regular at the traveler’s place too. It’s a shame, but I should stop coming here now, too.

As I pushed the restroom door, I collided with someone coming out. I tried to steady my blurred vision and lifted my head. But a face I had seen somewhere was right in front of me. He seemed to recognize me as well; he crinkled his eyes and stared straight at my face.

“Oh?”

“Oh?”

We both widened our eyes and made a sound at almost the same time. It was the blonde man I had seen at the restaurant where I went with Jerome. He was the one who had affectionately called Jerome by the nickname ‘Jerry.’

“And you are the baby who was with Jerry?”

A dry laugh escaped at the word ‘baby.’ Seeing this build, he still manages to call me baby. I smiled awkwardly and nodded. Perhaps because the alcohol was rising, my legs wobbled of their own accord. I leaned my body against the wall and gave a sheepish grin.

“Are you here to see Jerry?”

“No.”

“Then, is this a coincidence? Jerry is here.”

My heart felt like it had dropped to my feet. I staggered and swayed without realizing it, and the man reached out and wrapped his arm around my waist. The unfamiliar touch against my body felt unpleasant, so I roughly swatted his hand away. The man looked at his rejected hand and narrowed his brows.

“I’m a bit drunk, I’m sorry.”

I bowed my head to apologize and went into the restroom. Jerome is here? I felt uneasy, worried I might run into him. I didn’t have the confidence to see his face, even by accident, just yet. I gripped the sink with both hands and bowed my head. Jerome’s name was deeply embedded in my dizzy head, refusing to be erased.

I stared blankly at the face reflected in the mirror and then washed my face with cold water. My mood sank rapidly, as if it were being sucked into the deep sea. We were not in a relationship where running into each other would end well. I rubbed my stinging cheeks where the cold water had touched, left the restroom, and headed back into the room.

“I have to go.”

“Where are you going?”

“Home.”

“You’re leaving? Wait. I’ll call you a taxi.”

“I can go by myself.”

I answered vaguely and put on the padded jacket that was hanging on the coat rack. I gave a rough wave to Goo Jihoon and Kwon Raewon, and instead of the front door, I slipped out of the shop through a side door at the back. The biting wind grazed my cheeks as if scratching them. I hadn’t brought a car, so I had to take a taxi home. Exhaling a puff of white breath, I looked around. Where was the taxi stand? I had no sense of direction due to the alcohol. I stood in place for a moment trying to recall the location of the taxi stand, but nothing came to mind. Ha… I let out a sigh and sat down on the steps.

I pulled the hood of my jacket over my head, wrapped my arms around my knees, and curled up. Ah, I need to go home, but I’m so sleepy. I blinked, then closed my eyes without realizing it.

I felt someone shaking my body and struggled to lift my eyelids. As I blinked a few times, a blurry figure came into view. Where am I? The icy wind crept into my collar. I shook my head a couple of times to fend off the sleepiness, and my head throbbed. I lowered my gaze and just blinked.

“Jin, try to pull yourself together.”

“…Who, are you.”

“Why are you doing this here?”