I’m Debuting With The Bias I Killed Chapter 9

Chapter 9

 

After becoming Han Sang-yoon’s roommate and cleaning partner, I gained one more teacher.

I couldn’t exactly cling to I-yul throughout the entire survival show, so this was an unexpected piece of good news.

“Is it because I-yul taught you?”

Han Sang-yoon stared at my movements for quite a while before tilting his head.

“Something about it… feels similar.”

‘Sharp.’

I was happy that there was something about me that resembled I-yul, but at the same time, I felt a little guilty about it.

“I don’t really have a dance line yet.”

I brushed it off with an appropriate smile.

“Still, it’s impressive that you’ve memorized the entire choreography.”

“Thank you.”

“The dance line can come later.”

Han Sang-yoon lightly clapped his hands.

“Right now, the priority is not making mistakes.”

“Yes.”

As expected, he was different.

Practical and precise.

‘That’s why he debuted.’

“The part you were curious about…… was it here?”

“Yes. The highlight section is too fast–”

“It is fast.”

The highlight part of the signal song.

A hellish section where your hands and feet didn’t stop for even a moment as they raced along with the surging beat.

“C-Could you show me once, Sang-yoon-nim?”

“…….”

For a moment, Han Sang-yoon stared straight at me.

‘What?’

Just as I wondered if I had said something wrong…

“Pfft.”

Han Sang-yoon burst out laughing.

No, ‘burst out’ didn’t quite describe it. He laughed so hard that his uvula was fully visible. His characteristic breathless laughter made me awkwardly laugh along with him.

“Wait… did you just call me Sang-yoon-nim?”

“Ah.”

Only then did I realize.

“What do you mean, ‘nim’…”

“I’m sorry.”

“No, you don’t have to apologize.”

Han Sang-yoon barely managed to suppress his laughter and waved his hand.

“Just call me casually.”

That was even more uncomfortable.

At the same time as my regression, I had become nineteen. Choi Un-jo had become my age, while Han Sang-yoon had become my senior.

‘Hey, you! I was originally your hyung!’

And by quite a lot, too.

“Yes. Sang-yoon…”

I absolutely couldn’t do it.

“…nim.”

In the end, I attached it again.

Han Sang-yoon burst out laughing once more.

“Sorry, I laughed too loudly. It’s just that hearing you call me Sang-yoon-nim when we’re only two years apart–”

Only after laughing for quite a while did he finally compose himself.

“Wait a second. I’ll show you properly.”

He lightly loosened up his body, then moved to the music.

“Wow…”

Even though it was the same movement, the feeling was completely different.

Han Sang-yoon’s dancing had dynamics.

“Want to try dancing it?”

“……Yes.”

Of course, the result was horrific.

If Han Sang-yoon was an elegant swan gliding gracefully across the surface of the water, I was the swan whose every desperate struggle underneath was completely visible.

“Hmm.”

Just one syllable.

But somehow, that made it even scarier.

“You look… really busy right now.”

“Ah….”

“You’re in too much of a hurry to show every single movement.”

He had seen straight through me.

“This isn’t exercise. It’s dancing.”

He tapped out the beat with his finger.

“With exercise, you have to use your strength from beginning to end.”

Tap.

“But dancing isn’t like that.”

Tap.

“You put strength here–”

Swoosh.

“And here, you just let it flow.”

It felt like I had been hit over the head with a hammer.

‘That was the difference.’

Until now, I had been dancing every movement with all my strength.

That was why I kept looking like a clumsy robot.

‘Fifty times isn’t going to be enough.’

“I’ll try it one more time.”

I couldn’t help it.

If that was the case, I would have to do it 100 times, 150 times.

“Okay.”

Han Sang-yoon smiled.

“This time, let go of some of that greed.”

I quietly gripped the hourglass.

Shhk.

Thirty seconds earlier.

Again, shhk.

Thirty seconds earlier.

The same movement.

The same beat.

The same explanation.

The exact same thirty seconds repeated endlessly.

Fifty times.

One hundred times.

And on the 147th repetition…

‘Got it.’

I finally got the feel for it.

The timing of when strength went in and then came out.

The empty spaces between movements.

‘This should be enough.’

I put away the hourglass and began moving to the music again.

This time, I deliberately made a few more mistakes.

It would be strange if I suddenly became too good.

I repeated it about five more times.

“Ah.”

Han Sang-yoon smiled faintly.

“It’s much better. This much after only five tries is pretty fast.”

‘What do you mean five? This is my 152nd.’

“Thank you! Sang-yoon…”

My lips moved.

“…nim.”

I failed again in the end.

My legs were so exhausted they felt ready to burst, but harder than repeating the movement 152 times was still that single syllable: hyung.

 

***

 

The day of the midterm evaluation.

Twenty trainees entered the practice room all at once.

“I’m so nervous I feel like I’m going to throw up.”

“Hey, shut up. The microphones can pick that up.”

The air was so dry with tension that even a small whisper sounded sharp.

When I looked beside me, Kang I-yul was catching his breath while lightly holding his casted arm.

That sight kept catching my eye.

‘…If only I’d known a little earlier.’

The Danger Level, which remained stubbornly at 90%, made me resent it for no reason.

The fact that I-yul himself knew nothing about it weighed on me even more.

That was why I absolutely had to succeed today.

“Let’s go in too.”

The atmosphere in the practice room was distinctly different from usual.

Two company-affiliated trainers were seated on the left, two external judges on the right. And sitting in the center was CEO Song In-hyuk.

A heavy atmosphere hung over the room, thick with tension.

Of course, I was a little different.

‘I watched this so many times on television.’

I even felt an unnecessary sense of familiarity.

Once preparations for filming were complete, MC Kang Se-jun walked forward.

“Nice to meet you, everyone. Have you been practicing well?”

“Yes!”

“Before we film the signal song tomorrow, we’ll be conducting a midterm evaluation.”

At the word ‘evaluation,’ some people’s hands trembled, while others squeezed their eyes shut.

“Currently, you have been assigned code numbers from 1 to 20 according to your order of joining the company.”

The number attached to my chest suddenly felt unusually heavy.

“Of course.”

Kang Se-jun smiled.

“That number will continue to change from here on out.”

I heard small sounds of people swallowing.

The number attached to their chests wasn’t simply a number.

It was the most intuitive standard for proving their position here.

It was one of the charms of Boys Code, as well as one of its cruelest elements.

“Today’s midterm evaluation results will determine your positions in the signal song.”

The atmosphere, already as tense as thin ice, became even tighter.

“And the center of the signal song, which I’m sure everyone is interested in, will also be decided today.”

In an instant, the trainees’ expressions changed.

The unwritten rule of idol survival shows.

[The signal-song center always debuts.]

Your position determined how much of the camera you could own.

That was why trainees risked their lives challenging for the center position in every idol survival show.

No matter how talented or good-looking you were, if you weren’t caught on camera, all of it was meaningless.

“The signal-song positions will be divided into Codes A through C. Of course, A is the highest level.”

He paused for a moment and lightly scanned the trainees.

“And there will be only one trainee, the most outstanding trainee, who will stand at the center as the sole Code S.”

The air in the practice room shook once again.

“Then.”

Kang Se-jun flipped his cue card.

“From now on, we’ll begin the midterm evaluation.”

After looking around at the trainees for a moment, he asked,

“Is there anyone who would like to be evaluated first?”

Nobody moved.

Naturally.

Going first, and being the very first person to be evaluated in the entire survival broadcast, was an enormous burden.

That was why even before my regression, nobody had been willing to step forward.

In that silence, I raised my hand without hesitation.

“If there’s no one…”

Kang Se-jun spotted my raised hand and smiled.

“Ah, there’s a trainee raising his hand over there.”

The moment he finished speaking, several cameras simultaneously turned toward me.

The judges who had been looking through their evaluation sheets all raised their heads at once.

Half of them looked at me before lowering their heads again, while the other half wore expressions of interest.

Of course, the most surprised person was Kang I-yul, right beside me.

“You’re… raising your hand?”

“Yeah. It’s better to get it over with first, right?”

“…….”

“I’ll do it the way you taught me.”

I held out my fist.

Kang I-yul hesitated for a moment before quietly raising his hand.

Tap.

That brief contact somehow eased some of the tension.

“Code Number 20, please come forward.”

Phew.

I took a small breath and stepped forward.

“Your trainee period is…”

One of the judges flipped through my profile.

“Two weeks?”

One eyebrow rose.

“But you’re first?”

He removed the hand that had been propping up his chin.

“You’re a fearless one.”

I had always been fairly fearless, but after dying once, there wasn’t much left for me to be afraid of.

“Yes. I hear that often.”

“Whether that confidence is justified or you’re simply fearless–”

He placed his pen down with a tap.

“We’ll know once we see you.”

I stood on the center mark on the floor.

I took a short breath.

The signal song’s intro began playing.

The opening ‘Boom’ came in after counting exactly ten seconds in my head.

Everyone waited for the moment the intro ended, but…

‘If you do that, you’ll be late.’

Even in the broadcast before my regression, more than half of the trainees would get nervous and miss the timing.

It was the perfect timing I had discovered myself while running the challenge account.

‘Nine, ten!’

Boom!

I extended my hand exactly on time.

“Huh?”

Someone reacted quietly.

That was how precise the timing was.

‘Good.’

The somewhat spirited start was a little embarrassing, but there was one life lesson I had learned thoroughly from Yoo Seong-ah.

If you pushed through with momentum, there was nothing you couldn’t accomplish.

I caught my breath and focused on the vocals.

 

♪ The only boy

♪ Who can solve this secret

 

Back when I was a producer, it was difficult to explain in words the feeling I had in mind while making a song, so I personally recorded guides for every song.

I had no idea how much the singers I knew had teased me while I played those guides for them.

‘Who knew that would help this much.’

I wasn’t worried about forgetting the lyrics in the first place.

I had probably listened to this song more than anyone else here.

Maybe even more than the producer who made the song, Lowkey.

 

♪ Because that’s me

♪ Focus on me

 

The judges’ gazes sharpened.

I safely finished the first verse and entered the second.

I hadn’t made a mistake yet.

I just had to take it one step at a time.

Don’t get impatient.

Thanks to my younger body, I wasn’t as short of breath either, so in one way or another, things weren’t too bad.

 

♪ Escape from this place

♪ To where you are

♪ I’m almost there

 

This wasn’t simply a stage.

Hundreds of times.

Thousands of times.

Rewinding, dancing again, watching again.

The time I had held onto until the very end, despite being mocked.

I was gradually becoming short of breath.

But it was as though the function in my brain that detected pain had disappeared, because my movements didn’t slow down at all.

It was the power of repetitive learning.

My body remembered and moved before my mind did, reproducing the movements I-yul had taught me.

“Oh…”

The judges’ expressions slowly began to change.

Some smiled faintly, while others whispered into the ears of the people beside them.

Hoping that it was a positive signal, I raced toward the highlight.

 

♪ Make a new history

♪ Beyond this door

♪ That will shine brilliantly

♪ New world…

 

Even as I belted out the high note, the choreography continued.

Although my breathing wavered slightly, I pushed through to the end.

No matter what, completing the performance was what mattered.

The method Han Sang-yoon had taught me had also helped tremendously.

Rather than ‘throwing’ every movement with force, I expressed each one accurately but on a smaller scale.

Using that as a connecting thread gave me a little room to regulate my breathing.

 

♪ Open this door

♪ The only code

♪ Boy’s code!

 

The final line.

I planted my foot firmly and thrust my right hand toward the sky.

“Huff, huff…”

My breathing came out harshly.

It had been a long time since I’d tasted blood in my mouth.

My heart was pounding even harder than when I used to run like a madman to secure a spot in the first row at events.

‘It’s over…’

Objectively speaking, it hadn’t been a perfect performance.

I had flipped the hourglass hundreds of times to get used to singing while dancing.

But my absolute skill level was still lacking.

Still, I had no regrets.

I hadn’t missed a single movement, and I hadn’t flubbed a single lyric. At the very least, I could say with certainty that this performance was everything I could do at my current level.

Because this time, I hadn’t turned the hourglass again.