I’m Just a Counselor Chapter 52

I talked to him, trying to somehow shake off the ticklish feeling.

 

“You hurt yourself so much that a wizard even made an ointment for you, it’s not something you would normally use on a wound like this, is it?”

 

“The wounds inflicted by the demon beast are poisonous and need to be treated well, that’s why a wizard was used to make the ointment, but that doesn’t mean it’s not for ordinary wounds.”

 

“So this ointment is what the Duke uses when he’s injured by a demon?”

 

“Yes.”

 

Jeremiah glanced up at me, then added.

 

“But you don’t have to feel bad about it, it’s leftover, so I keep it as an emergency medicine, and if you need it, you can ask for another.”

 

“…….”

 

“Not to brag, but I don’t use it much anymore.”

 

I blinked at Jeremiah’s casual tone.

 

“I suppose that means you’re less likely to get hurt by the beast now.”

 

It made sense, considering the way he’d looked the other day.

 

It must mean that he’s gotten strong enough to fight demons without getting hurt, which was a bit of a boast.

 

Jeremiah shrugged, but I cringed slightly.

 

‘To get to this point…’

 

Jeremiah must have fallen hard and hurt himself, spilled blood all over the white snow, and with so many eyes on him, he couldn’t show any signs of pain.

 

I imagined the days when he didn’t speak. The Jeremiah of those days, alone in a dark room, applying ointments and tending to his wounds.

 

“…….”

 

There would have been no one to suffer with him.

 

Jeremiah wouldn’t have done that to Estella, and I doubt he would have done that to Shane. He would have had to be a tough boss to Sir Melvin or the others, so of course he wouldn’t have said anything.

 

“What do you think?”

 

He said, closing the lid of the box as he finished applying the ointment.

 

For a moment, I almost let my frustration spill out, but I managed to keep my mouth shut.

 

‘Pity Jeremiah, what can I say?’

 

I’d be ashamed of myself if I heard a woman, a mere hired hand, view the Duke in such a way.

 

I shook my head before Jeremiah’s cold reply could come. Perhaps it’s best to keep that to myself.

 

Anyway, when I’m done, I’m ashamed of myself for making such a fuss.

 

I turned to Jeremiah, who was rising from his seat, and muttered something apologetic.

 

“I don’t know what I did to deserve the Duke’s favor.”

 

It felt even more so now that I said it. Jeremiah had plenty of other people to call on.

 

But who was I to say he couldn’t help himself to dance lessons, apply ointments, and…

 

‘Estella,’ I thought, ‘I still don’t know if Jeremiah’s favors… are worth it.’

 

I know I’ve helped Jeremiah, but I think he’s done more than that.

 

‘Maybe it’s because he made such a strong impression on me when I first met him.’

 

It’s not that his casual treatment of me… is a burden, but rather that I keep feeling a barrier between us that I can’t quite get past.

 

Jeremiah returned the ointment to the drawer and smirked at my comment.

 

“I told you, I’m your suitor.”

 

“You can’t be serious.”

 

“I’m not kidding.”

 

Jeremiah shrugged.

 

“Anyway, I was very worried about you right now, and that’s why I gave you the medicine.”

 

“It wasn’t even a big wound…”

 

“Wounds don’t matter if they’re big or small, they still hurt.”

 

“I think you’re going to miss me…”

 

“I know that, and I hope you do too.”

 

He retrieved the shoes I’d kicked off and laid them in front of me, then sat down beside me.

 

The bed rocked gently, and my body tilted slightly toward him. I opened my mouth to speak in an involuntary whisper.

 

“Me too…”

 

‘I want to know what hurt you, Duke; I want to know how much the other wounds you have hurt; I want to know what I don’t know; I want to know what I don’t know; I want to care about you, too…’

 

The sentences rose like a tsunami in my mouth, but I kept my mouth shut this time.

 

Jeremiah tilted his head questioningly when no more words flowed from me.

 

“You too?”

 

“…I can’t do any more dance practice today.”

 

I shook my head, the words stuck in my throat. Jeremiah nodded as if to say enough is enough.

 

I looked around his room for something to distract me from my dance practice, and my eyes fell on a bookcase filled with books.

 

“Ah, Duke. Do you think there are any books on etiquette in there?”

 

“I’m sure there are.”

 

I hadn’t seen it the last time, but there were many books, so there must be a book on etiquette.

 

Jeremiah frowned as I started to put my shoes back on, and held out his hand as if to restrain me. Standing up instead, he said.

 

“Can I get them for you?”

 

“No, I can do it.”

 

“You mean with those feet? You’re not wearing those shoes.”

 

No, it’s not like I can’t walk at all, and I think I can put my shoes back on now. You’ve had a lot of foot pain…

 

I stared at the back of Jeremiah’s head as he made his way to the bookshelf, mouth agape.

 

“Am I being… handcuffed now?”

 

A small gasp escaped me as soon as I was properly reminded that he was moving for me.

 

He thinks I have a real broken leg.

 

The old Jeremiah would have said, “Yeah, but did you do anything?” even if my leg was broken.

 

‘I don’t even know…’

 

As I stared at him, he came back to me with all the books. I took the books he handed me.

 

The title, “The Basics of Etiquette,” was plastered across the cover. I flipped through a few pages and realized that it looked like something a beginner could easily learn from.

 

“Can you lend me this? I’m going to use it in my room to learn until I get to the Islands.”

 

“I don’t mind lending it to you, but… I have to keep practicing my dancing anyway, so you should just come and take a look.”

 

“Uh, sure…”

 

Well, I do need to practice, so I’ll just have to do it against Jeremiah. If I don’t know something, I can ask him right away.

 

I readily accepted the offer of an experienced teaching assistant.

 

It’s a little hard to have to keep practicing dancing in the meantime, but… Come on, my stamina, it’s all for Estella!

 

“But what about etiquette?”

 

Jeremiah asked, puzzled, as he watched me flip through the etiquette book. I glanced up at him, lowered my eyes, and answered.

 

“Because I’m going to a New Year’s banquet and I’m supposed to observe… and I’ve almost forgotten.”

 

“Well, this will be Miss Vanessa’s first banquet since she left the Islands.”

 

“Yes. Besides, it’s not a relaxed party… and I’m afraid I’ll be a nuisance to the Duke and Estella if I do anything wrong.”

 

Jeremiah gave a small snort at my comment.

 

“No matter what Miss Vanessa does wrong, no one would dare point it out in your presence.”

 

“…….”

 

“As long as you show that you have the Oppenheim name on your back, who would dare to speak in front of it?”

 

Jeremiah said arrogantly, crossing his arms and glaring at me.

 

“So you don’t need to be so paranoid about how your behavior will affect me or Estella.”

 

“Haha.”

 

I simply laughed at his words.

 

‘After hearing that, I guess I’ll have to do better…’

 

In truth, it wasn’t anyone else, but myself.

 

Jeremiah is very proud of his family name, and if I ever misbehave and bring a blemish to it, I’m afraid it will tarnish his pride.

 

Even if no one talks about it in public, it will be talked about behind closed doors. Social circles are notoriously cruel.

 

‘I need to be a little more perfect.’

 

If Jeremiah or Estella did something wrong, I might be able to forgive them, but… not me.

 

I swallowed hard and turned my attention back to the etiquette book.

 

Jeremiah watched me for a while, and then, as if to lighten the mood, he spoke up.

 

“Come to think of it, it was your manners that made me doubt you were really a commoner in the first place.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yes. Your table manners are too perfect for a commoner.”

 

Jeremiah’s words reminded me of the first time I’d heard him speak.

 

“Ah, my first day at the duke’s castle.”

 

I remember eating carefully, wondering if I had gotten it right. Luckily, it must have been good enough for Jeremiah to say that.