In This Life I Will Die as an Actress Not a Villainess Chapter 54

Inside a darkened room.

Someone sat before a bright monitor, fingers tap-tap-tapping on the keyboard.

A young woman with a short bob haircut.

Her screen displayed windows upon windows related to Han Sena and Palace Flower.

「Title – Short Film vs. Actual Filming Scene Frame-by-Frame Comparison.gif / Posted by – GifCraftingMaster」

– Wow, that was half a year ago?

– Now I totally get what Lee Seokhyun meant lololol

– I’d feel self-conscious too

– This is method acting

「Title – Beginner Girl Group Choreography Tutorial (Link) / Posted by – DoubleSena」

– My actor’s been killing it since her rookie days, no way she’s a beginner

– It’s even better though?

– The cute beginner taste is the ultimate truth. Please respect my preferences.

– Anyone into sexy other than that can leave please.

The moment press conference articles dropped, Han Sena’s fan cafe turned into a festival atmosphere, feasting on a bounty of content.

The pledges for the short film and girl group dance had fans rejoicing.

But the woman who’d been staring at her monitor for a while furrowed her brow slightly.

“Hmm.”

– YooJianFloormat: ……

Known as “YooJianFloormat,” this was the username of a notable fan in Han Sena’s fan club.

Her real name, unknown to anyone, was Park Dahye.

Park Dahye, who’d been making a displeased expression, started to write a comment but stopped.

Then she opened a new window and began composing a post.

「Title – Viewership Encouragement Guide to Achieve Girl Group Dance Pledge / Posted by – YooJianFloormat」

It was a fan cafe post containing a systematic guide with various SNS promotion methods and key talking points about Palace Flower’s charm for pitching to real-life acquaintances.

“Good content needs proper promotion from the start. Like this.”

In less than a minute, ding-ding notifications began ringing with comments.

– As expected, you’re not a notable fan for nothing.

– I’ll work hard on promotion!!

Below the guide post, verification posts about promotional efforts started mushrooming.

Park Dahye wore a satisfied smile, as if this was exactly what she’d wanted.

* * *

On the road, riding in the van.

Feeling a vibration, I opened my phone to find a text message.

– Noona. Your fan cafe is going crazy right now.

It was a message from Seon Yuseok for once.

Geez, that kid keeps visiting the cafe even though it’s not even his fan page.

Don’t tell me he’s actually registered?

Following Yuseok’s tip, the moment I opened the fan cafe, a gasp escaped me.

It was truly half-festival, half-promotion—an absolute frenzy.

“Our originals… why are they being so serious?”

Did they want to see my girl group dance that badly?

Same with the Flat Shoes incident—that wasn’t my image anyway.

Maybe they’re going even crazier precisely because it’s a different image?

Plus, with Lee Seokhyun thrown into the mix, his fandom had apparently joined forces too.

– We praise actor Han Sena-nim for bringing out our oppa’s dance.

– Making a top star dance—she’s no ordinary newcomer. Become a huge success, Han Sena!

Etc., etc…

They seemed to be praising me profusely for drawing out Lee Seokhyun’s girl group dance pledge.

The two fandoms were actively exchanging content to promote across community sites and SNS, coordinating everything.

Fandoms are this terrifying, huh.

Cold sweat broke out.

In my past life, I’d never had such an active fandom, so it felt both fascinating and bewildering.

I turned off my phone and gazed out the window for a moment.

Would they really make it all the way to Yeouido Park though?

Nah, no way.

Just then, my manager oppa stopped the car.

“We’re here. Have a good time. But don’t get drunk.”

“Ah, I’m heading out!”

After getting out of the car and entering the restaurant, an indescribable scene unfolded.

“Man, our Sunim-ssi! I had no idea she could hold her liquor like this!”

“Seriously, we got the pond scene all wrong. She wouldn’t even flinch at downing that imperial wine in one shot. Should we reshoot?”

The staff, who’d arrived without me, were all watching the new Morning Dew commercial playing from the beam projector.

“Aaaah, everyone! No! Turn it off right now!”

Ugh, so embarrassing.

People giggled at my reaction.

Today we’d rented out an entire restaurant for a company dinner.

This was the momentous occasion where we’d all watch the first broadcast monitoring together.

Even while joking around, everyone wore slightly tense expressions.

I felt the same way.

That’s when one staff member spoke up.

“I’m dying of nerves. What do you think our viewership ratings will be?”

“Maybe 10%? No wait, 7%? No, 4%…?”

Another staff member answered in a progressively shrinking voice.

The atmosphere deflated along with that shrinking voice.

Then Director Kang, who’d been sitting quietly, stood up.

“Let’s not check the numbers until dawn after tonight’s dinner. We might just kill the mood by checking. I got burned badly last time.”

Huh?

Including me, everyone looked at Director Kang with puzzled expressions, but only the cinematographer chuckled knowingly.

He seemed to know the inside story.

“The director’s previous work was <Dreaming Flames>.”

Wow, Dreaming Flames.

How long has it been since I’ve heard that drama title?

But from what I remember, that one did well, didn’t it?

“It caught on through word of mouth past the midpoint, but the early viewership was pretty rough.”

At those words, Director Kang narrowed the space between his brows as if recalling hell itself.

It made for quite an amusing picture.

If he’d received real-time viewership reports the day after that monitoring, with his personality he wouldn’t have been able to tell the actors and would’ve suffered internally.

With a pride scratch about double the normal person’s as a bonus.

“Back then, our director drank enough booze for two people. For two people.”

Everyone burst out laughing at that.

Then Director Kang spoke up again.

“So today, let’s focus on the final product and drink to our hearts’ content for all our hard work. We’ve still got another month to push through.”

That’s how people started gathering in small groups to eat in earnest.

As the atmosphere ripened, people just sipped their beer lightly—no one was boldly throwing back their drinks.

Everyone’s thinking the same thing.

I also decided to postpone getting drunk for now.

It had been too long since I’d monitored like this.

Usually I’d either miss the broadcast time due to filming, or because I was always in supporting roles, I’d monitor alone at home on days without shooting.

Monitoring those stale, clichéd villain performances, no less.

While doing that, I’d researched how to make each similar villain role look even slightly different from the others.

‘That’s how it was back then.’

Lost in nostalgic feelings alone, one staff member looked at the screen and shouted.

“Oh, it’s starting!”

Everyone turned toward the screen hurriedly, as if they’d planned it.

In this moment, Teacher Yoon Youngjae, Won Hyerim sunbaenim, Lee Seokhyun, and even Heo Sojin—who’d been strangely quiet lately—all wore equally tense faces.

Soon, the drama’s splendid opening unfolded.

Against a beautifully colored hanji paper background, the characters were drawn in watercolor while their actor names were introduced.

For my turn, they drew Sunim in official robes, tying up her hair in a topknot as she cross-dressed.

So pretty…

Gradually getting drawn in, the drama began in earnest.

After watching for quite a while, Teacher approached and quietly asked me.

“Good, right?”

“Yes, it’s great. What should I do, Teacher? I think I really love this project.”

Watching it together with everyone somehow made the overwhelming feelings much stronger.

Seeing my expression, Teacher smiled broadly.

“That’s right. That’s an actor’s asset.”

Teacher’s face, saying these words, was also flushed with emotion.

He had the excited eyes of an actor who’d just debuted.

Teacher’s gaze made my heart swell too.

The full hour of viewing was absolutely satisfying.

Enough to confirm that over a hundred staff members who’d read the script had all spread their wings of imagination in the same direction.

The pictures in my head had been specifically realized.

That’s when, at one scene, the staff’s laughter exploded.

The final scene—where Sunim gets caught by the king on her very first day exploring the palace.

As the king strode toward Sunim, she flinched in surprise and backed away.

Watching that somehow made me embarrassed too.

“Geez, I can’t tell where the acting starts!”

The assistant director threw out a joke while downing his beer.

Lee Seokhyun’s confident lead and my embarrassed appearance seemed quite entertaining to the staff.

Lee Seokhyun also started teasing from the side.

“Our Sena-ssi acts really well. But above all, she acts embarrassed really well. Is this method acting?”

“Ugh, go away. What’s with you?”

Like that, with a close-up shot of flustered Sunim, the next episode preview flowed out.

As the drama ended, the art and costume teams—who handled the flower and core of sageuks—cried out in overwhelming emotion.

“Ah, it’s so beautiful! This is what a sageuk should be.”

“Sunbaenim, I think I’m going to cry. Sob, even to my own eyes the costumes are so pretty.”

Thunderous applause erupted for the art team.

“Everyone worked so hard! Other teams too!”

I also sent my applause with a bright smile.

The director smiled broadly for the first time and raised his glass.

“Everyone worked incredibly hard, and today let’s drink without restraint. For all of us who worked so hard!”

“Cheers!”

The sound of clinking glasses echoed through the restaurant.

* * *

The next day.

“Ugh, my head.”

I’d pushed it way too hard.

A rare late morning greeted me at home, and the hangover welcomed me first.

How long has it been since I drank this much?

“What time is it…”

When I turned on my phone, congratulatory messages from people who’d watched the first broadcast were waiting.

Seon Yuseok, Flat Shoes staff and actors, even Professor Lee Sungjin.

Gratitude for everyone made me smile.

Knock knock—

That’s when I heard knocking on my bedroom door.

“Daughter, are you up? Come out for some hangover soup.”

It was Dad’s voice, which I hadn’t heard in a while.

Rubbing my eyes, I went out to find spicy bean sprout soup already laid out on the table.

“Wow.”

I wobbled over and sat down, immediately picking up my spoon.

“Geez, how much did you drink?”

Despite the words, Mom and Dad sat across from me, beaming as they watched me slurp the soup.

“Kek— Why are you staring like that…”

“We also watched the first episode yesterday.”

Mom said in an excited voice.

“It was so entertaining that I forgot you were our daughter, right?”

Dad added with a smile.

“You picked a good project, our daughter. Now I understand why you worked so hard to do that one.”

“Hehe, of course. Who am I?”

Mom and Dad’s encouragement made me feel good enough for the hangover to fly away.

“It suddenly feels like you’ve grown into an adult. Now I feel like you’d do well no matter where we put you. Our daughter, we’re so proud.”

Dad’s suddenly tossed-out words made my nose tingle.

“This early in the morning, making me embarrassed…”

Mom stroked my hair as if she understood everything I felt.

“You worked hard.”

Ah, I can’t.

Feeling like tears might fall, I quickly lowered my head and drank the soup.

Mom and Dad’s warm embrace still felt unbelievable sometimes even now.

In moments like these, occasionally my past life in my forties felt more like a fantasy instead.

As if I’d dreamed a long dream.

Swallowing tears, I looked at Mom and Dad’s faces smiling brightly.

If I were the protagonist of some story, what kind of person would Han Sena be?

How old would she be?

Could she do well?

Before I knew it, so many things had changed, and now I could neither turn back nor return.

How will I live from here on?