Formless Chapter 15

Heewoon ground his teeth. His scalp, being pulled back, felt like it was going to peel off. Heewoon grabbed Gangwoo’s hand, which was gripping his hair, with both of his hands. His gaze involuntarily went to Gangwoo’s other hand. If that hand clenched into a fist and hit his face, it made a very gruesome sound.

Gangwoo, realizing Heewoon was distracted, pulled his head back.

“Huh? What do you think?”

“Aack! I-I did something wrong.”

The chilling face came into view.

His head, which hadn’t gotten enough sleep, felt like it was half submerged in water.

He felt unjustly treated. Seo Gangwoo, the 16-year-old student who was snide whenever he had the chance, the loan sharks, his mother, and his older brother. The people who had entered his life all seemed to be at ease, but it felt like only he was having such a hard time.

His life was only cruel to him.

“Why are you crying.”

Heewoon belatedly realized that he was crying. Clear tears endlessly streamed down his white cheeks. His suddenly wet eyelashes drooped down.

The strong hand that had been pulling his hair released its grip. His scalp throbbed and tingled.

“Why are you crying over something so minor.”

It wasn’t minor. The actions Seo Gangwoo called minor were a great threat and terror to Heewoon. Anger surged abruptly. But he was also heartbroken that he had to swallow this too.

“Hnngh…”

Heewoon, who gasped out a sob, rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand.

“Did I hit you?”

Heewoon roughly wiped away the tears that kept flowing.

“Huh? Tell me. Did I hit you?”

Gangwoo poked Heewoon’s wet cheek, poke, with his finger and asked. He seemed dumbfounded watching Heewoon suddenly burst into tears.

Heewoon, who was occasionally letting out sobs, said, gasping.

“You, heuk, grabbed my head, gasp, hard…”

“…”

Gangwoo silently stared at Heewoon. His heavily wet face was contorted in sorrow. Gangwoo, who watched Heewoon fumbling to touch the back of his head, let out a low laugh. He tilted his head, peered into Heewoon’s face, and said.

“So. Are you crying because grabbing your head hurt?”

“Hup… gasp, no…”

“Yes, you are. You are, though.”

He reached his hand towards Heewoon’s head. When Heewoon squeezed his eyes shut, he made a shh sound. The long fingers parted his hair and slowly stroked his scalp.

“Stop it.”

“Uh-huu…”

“Stop it, I said.”

His tone became firm, and Heewoon opened his closed eyes. Seo Gangwoo’s eyes, which Heewoon had expected to have an annoyed expression, were surprisingly faintly curved.

Heewoon blinked a couple of times. The pooled tears dropped down again, plop, plop. Gangwoo, frowning while still smiling, wiped away the tears.

“Just sleep.”

Gangwoo gently pushed his forehead so he would lean against the seat. Heewoon’s fidgeting movements quickly stopped when Gangwoo clicked his tongue.

“Close your eyes.”

Heewoon closed his eyes. When tears continued to stream down his cheek, Gangwoo clicked his tongue and gently wiped them away. His flat chest rose and fell with the lingering effects of his crying.

“If you open your eyes, you’ll be in trouble.”

“Uh-huh.”

Seeing Heewoon’s eyelids twitch and tense, Gangwoo ruffled his hair.

Heewoon felt the hand that had been ruffling his hair move away.

The car engine started. Where is he going. Left, right. He probably left the parking lot. And then…

Heewoon fell into a deep sleep just like that.

He had thought he could sleep as soon as his head rested on something, but he hadn’t thought he could do it right next to Seo Gangwoo.

“Wake up.”

The hand shaking his shoulder was so forceful that his entire body shook, and Heewoon groaned and opened his eyes. He looked at the outside through his bleary eyes and realized it was Seo Gangwoo’s house.

He widened his eyes in surprise, but a yawn burst out. Gangwoo put his finger into Heewoon’s parted mouth and chuckled.

“Get out.”

Heewoon opened the passenger door and got out, staggering slightly. Seo Gangwoo, who watched him with a look of disdain, strode closer, grabbed his arm, and went inside the house.

Voices were heard from the kitchen where Gangwoo had gone. Heewoon looked back and then naturally walked up to Gangwoo’s room on the second floor.

Seo Gangwoo’s room was still wide and clean, and very slightly familiar. Heewoon glanced at the half-open door and flopped onto the bed with white sheets.

Falling asleep was instantaneous.

A while later, Gangwoo, who entered his room, found Heewoon on his stomach, sleeping on the bed.

“Isn’t he sick?”

Gangwoo clicked his tongue lightly and approached the bed. Heewoon was only making light, soft breathing sounds, as if he hadn’t sensed his presence. Gangwoo was about to put his hand on Heewoon’s shoulder, but instead knelt down. He rested his cheek on his arm draped over the bed and watched Heewoon’s sleeping face.

Comfortably closed eyes, straight eyebrows, flushed cheeks, slightly parted lips.

“Hey.”

He poked his soft cheek, poke, but Heewoon didn’t move.

He stared intently at Heewoon’s face for a while, then glanced at the clock and shook Heewoon awake. Heewoon blinked slowly and sat up.

Heewoon was led to the kitchen by Gangwoo, his hand held. Since he wasn’t fully awake, he bumped his nose into Gangwoo’s shoulder several times.

“Don’t you have eyes?”

Gangwoo sneered, then turned around, cupped Heewoon’s face, and rubbed his cheeks hard. The soft cheeks were mashed like dough beneath the hand covering his entire face.

Heewoon sat in front of the dining table and looked down blankly. In the earthenware pot placed in front of him was a plump chicken. He had wondered where the smell of herbal medicine was coming from, and it must have been this.

Gangwoo said it was good for his body and that he absolutely had to eat the whole chicken. To this, Heewoon thought, I’m going to throw up a whole chicken today.

Gangwoo spoke to Heewoon, who was only looking at the bowl.

“Hurry up and eat. Don’t go whining about being late again.”

“Okay.”

“Ah.”

Gangwoo, wearing a mischievous smile, deliberately picked up ginseng and garlic and popped it into his mouth. But Heewoon, unaware, was already chewing on his lips.

“Is it delicious?”

When Gangwoo asked, chuckling, Heewoon replied, Yeah, vaguely. Gangwoo glanced at the clock. It was already past 6:30.

Woo Heewoon, with dark circles under his eyes, seemed to be out of his mind. His eyes weren’t closed, but the chopsticks holding a piece of meat dropped the meat, thump, and only touched his lower lip. Despite this, he was still chewing as if something were in his mouth.

Gangwoo, who had been watching silently, scraped his chair back, drrrk, and stood up.

Only then did Heewoon snap to attention. He’s probably coming to hit me because I was picking at my food. He had already been told several times that he picked at his food.

“I-I’ll eat properly now!”

Heewoon tightly gripped the spoon and chopsticks he had been holding loosely. He might be sent flying backward right here. Instantly, his mind became very clear. The fear he hadn’t felt while he was immersed in sleep seemed to rush in all at once.

Heewoon, pale, tracked Gangwoo’s movements. However, contrary to Heewoon’s expectation, Gangwoo grabbed his arm to lift him up and then pulled his waist and sat down. Heewoon, who suddenly found himself sitting between Gangwoo’s thighs, blinked like an idiot.

“What good is it if you only keep your eyes open. You’re not in your right mind.”

Gangwoo took the chopsticks Heewoon was holding, speaking in a chiding tone. He pulled off a large piece of meat and shoved it into Heewoon’s mouth.

“Is the seasoning right?”

Heewoon mumbled, as he hadn’t been paying attention to the taste while eating, and Gangwoo clicked his tongue. He took a small spoonful of the broth, tasted it, and then added salt.

“You don’t even know the taste. There’s no point in feeding you something delicious.”

Gangwoo whispered, gnawing on the part where his ear and jaw met. Heewoon, completely awake, darted his eyes around and then reached for his chopsticks, which Gangwoo had taken.

“I can’t stand watching sunbae eat.”

“No. I can eat properly.”

Gangwoo dodged Heewoon’s hand and said, as if warning him.

“Put your hand. Between your thighs.”

When he spoke like this, Heewoon had no choice but to listen. Not that he didn’t listen even when he didn’t speak like this.

Thighs… Heewoon chewed on the word for a moment, then wiggled his hand into the gap between Gangwoo’s thigh and his own thigh.

“…What are you doing?”

“Uh-huh?”

Heewoon turned his head and looked at Gangwoo. Gangwoo, who had been frowning in bewilderment, suddenly let out a laugh.

“Ah.”

“Ah…”

Sweet rice and meat slipped into his slightly parted mouth, following the voice full of laughter.

Heewoon took the food Gangwoo gave him and glanced outside. He was worried someone might come. A fully grown adult sitting between a man’s thighs and being fed.

Since they had sex in the room several times, they probably knew. Then he wondered what they thought of him and Seo Gangwoo. Having sex, eating meals, but sometimes being beaten.

He also wondered how much those people knew about Seo Gangwoo.

“Did you swallow?”

Gangwoo tilted his head and peered at Heewoon, then pulled off another piece of meat. Chew thoroughly. Listening to the gentle voice from behind, he thought that it was much better than being beaten, in any case.

The meal ended after Heewoon ate half a chicken. When Heewoon said he was full, Gangwoo frowned and suddenly put his hand inside Heewoon’s t-shirt. Gangwoo, who had carefully felt Heewoon’s stomach, which had hardened in surprise, muttered.

“Is your stomach a little small. You’re full after just that.”

The large hand smoothed his bulging belly and came out of his clothes. Heewoon glanced back and stood up. It was 7 o’clock. If I say I’m going right now, will he let me go? He won’t let me go. The purpose is sex in the first place.

Then I’ll throw up again.

Heewoon bit his lip hard, looking at Gangwoo’s back as he held his hand and went up to the bedroom. He was truly exhausted today.

But instead of fondling Heewoon’s body, Seo Gangwoo hugged him tightly and lay down. When Heewoon looked at him bewildered, Gangwoo said.

“Take a nap for a bit and then go. Don’t be nodding off like a sick chicken.”

“Then… sex…?”

“Why. Are you disappointed? Should we do it?”

The firm arm that had burrowed behind his neck seemed to twitch, as if about to get up. Heewoon grabbed Gangwoo’s shoulder in horror.

“No!”

“…When you say you hate it that strongly, I start to feel a little bad.”

Heewoon glanced at Gangwoo’s expressionless face and stammered an excuse that it was because he was sleepy. Gangwoo, who had been staring intently at Heewoon, burst into laughter.

“I’m kidding. Hurry up and sleep. I’ll wake you up at eight.”