Sunshine Shower Chapter 99

“You’re the only one who takes care of me.”

Moon Seoyoon answered while pretending to eat, avoiding Woo Yeonjae’s gaze. Other than his father and some older relatives, no one knew about his depression during this time of year. While his maternal relatives were somewhat attentive, the only person truly close to him who looked after him was Woo Yeonjae.

“Yeah. I’m the only one.”

Woo Yeonjae slowly straightened his posture.

“So just stay by my side.”

The thought suddenly popped into Moon Seoyoon’s head: patients with summer depression are more likely to engage in self-harm compared to those with winter depression. They often feel anxious rather than just physically lethargic.

“It doesn’t really seem like it’s seasonal…”

“What do you mean?”

Woo Yeonjae moved closer and handed him a mug. Moon Seoyoon accepted the warm cup and leaned his head back against the sofa.

“I don’t think it’s seasonal depression.”

Woo Yeonjae glanced at him over the rim of his cup as he brought it to his lips.

“Maybe it’s because the anniversary is coming up.”

Whenever Woo Yeonjae casually mentioned the word “anniversary,” Moon Seoyoon felt a subtle gratitude. He much preferred this nonchalant attitude to the awkward, uncomfortable smiles some people gave when the topic came up.

“Probably. But I’ll start feeling better once the anniversary passes… I should be back to normal by early fall this year too.”

“Want me to go with you?”

Woo Yeonjae asked lightly. He was referring to visiting his mother’s resting place.

Moon Seoyoon shook his head, sipping the lukewarm tea despite the cool air.

“No, I prefer going alone.”

He used to go with his father until high school, but after getting his license, he went by himself. It was easier to say what he wanted to when he was alone.

“If I go alone, I can complain to my mom about you.”

Trying to hide his growing unease, Moon Seoyoon joked with a playful smile.

“Oh, have you been complaining about me all this time?”

Woo Yeonjae grinned, the corners of his mouth lifting.

“Then I should tell your mom you’ve been making me feel neglected lately.”

“How have I made you feel neglected?”

Moon Seoyoon chuckled and lightly tapped Woo Yeonjae’s arm. Usually, Woo Yeonjae would tease back with something like, “Why? You’ve been making me feel neglected,” but this time, he only lowered his eyes. The cup that had been hiding his mouth slowly came down.

“Moon Seoyoon.”

“What?”

“You haven’t been sleeping well lately, have you?”

They didn’t even sleep in adjoining rooms, so there was no way Woo Yeonjae could have noticed his restlessness. But given how out of it he’d been this morning, barely able to open his eyes, it wasn’t surprising that Woo Yeonjae could see through him. Still, Moon Seoyoon didn’t feel like answering, so he pretended to sip his tea, avoiding the question.

When he kept fiddling with the empty cup, Woo Yeonjae took it from him and set it down next to his own.

“You not answering means I’m right.”

“…I’ll be fine after a bit.”

Woo Yeonjae turned to face him, leaning his head back on the sofa, and his head naturally tilted to the side.

“Want to sleep together?”

What did that mean? Moon Seoyoon stared at him, unable to blink, his mind momentarily blank.

“You sleep better when someone’s next to you, don’t you?”

“…Do I?”

“Yeah.”

“How would you know that?”

This was news to him.

“I don’t see why you’d think I wouldn’t know…”

Woo Yeonjae’s eyes curved into a meaningful smile.

Moon Seoyoon searched his memory. They had shared a bed countless times, but ever since he’d developed feelings for Woo Yeonjae, he rarely got a good night’s sleep. In the past seven years, there had only been a few occasions when he’d slept deeply next to him, usually when he was exhausted from cramming for exams.

He had slept because he was tired, not because someone was next to him. Just as he was about to deny it, a memory flashed across his mind.

When they had sex.

The only recent time Woo Yeonjae had seen him fall asleep in the same bed was then. Like the lukewarm tea warming him from the inside, heat crept up his body. As the cool air from the air conditioner flowed through the room, Moon Seoyoon tried to push the memory aside and quickly rejected the offer.

“I’m not a kid. I’m fine.”

“Why?”

When Woo Yeonjae shifted, his knee brushed against Seoyoon’s thigh. While Seoyoon was wearing shorts because of the summer heat, Woo Yeonjae had on long sweatpants. The soft fabric rubbing against his bare skin made him shiver.

“You said during training in the military, you didn’t have any thoughts.”

“Well, that’s because I was constantly moving…”

Woo Yeonjae gave a thin smile.

“How did someone this innocent end up meeting such trashy guys…”

It took him a beat to fully understand the meaning of those words. Only then did Moon Seoyoon realize that he wasn’t overreacting. His mouth went dry, even though he had just drunk warm tea moments ago.

He fiddled with his fingernails, his lips parting slightly.

“I don’t plan on doing that again with you… I’m not the type to do it that often, anyway.”

“Really? Got it.”

The overly calm response sounded almost like he didn’t believe him.

“Still, if you need it, let me know.”

Moon Seoyoon once again gaped like a fish. Although physical affection between them had increased lately, he never imagined they’d have a conversation like this.

‘Did he enjoy the sex? Is that why he keeps bringing it up?’

Recently, Woo Yeonjae had been acting a bit strange. If asked what was strange, Moon Seoyoon wouldn’t be able to pinpoint exactly, but there was a subtle shift in his demeanor. Seoyoon instinctively knew that this small change was something only he could notice. He had known Woo Yeonjae for a long time, and it was a difference that no one else would pick up on.

‘It feels like…’

Like he knows.

The thought struck him suddenly, out of nowhere, and even he couldn’t figure out why it came to mind so abruptly.

Perhaps it was because of the recent vibe Woo Yeonjae was giving off.

“Woo Yeonjae.”

“Yeah.”

Moon Seoyoon cautiously observed his friend sitting beside him. Though his face and tone were the same as usual, there was a slight air of relaxation around him. His gently arched eyebrows, the subtle curve of his lips, and the way he looked at Seoyoon—all of it felt leisurely.

“What’s up?”

Woo Yeonjae had always been relaxed, possibly due to his flawless circumstances, but his natural temperament couldn’t be discounted either. He had been like that since they were kids, so Seoyoon had no reason to be surprised by it now. Yet, an odd sense of unease began to creep up on him.

“You…”

Moon Seoyoon bit his lip. It was hard to ask directly. Jumping to conclusions based on a mere sense of something being off, and assuming his childhood friend knew about his feelings, seemed far too risky.

“Yeah? What about me?”

“Do you… have something you want to tell me?”

Woo Yeonjae was quick on the uptake. If he had figured out Seoyoon’s feelings, he would immediately understand the meaning behind such a question.

Moon Seoyoon held his breath as he watched him closely. Woo Yeonjae’s gaze, which had momentarily drifted, slid back to him, his eyes narrowing slightly.

“Something to tell you?”

“Yeah.”

What if he says the person he likes is me? Seoyoon bit the inside of his lip, trying to calm the anxious pounding of his heart. It wasn’t a question he had asked lightly, and his heart raced as if it were about to leap out of his chest. There was no turning back now.

“There’s a lot I could say.”

“…What?”

Their eyes met, and Seoyoon’s tension only grew. Not knowing what Woo Yeonjae might say made his fingers tense up.

“Only hang out with me.”

“What?”

“I get jealous when you hang out with other guys, so just stick with me.”

Woo Yeonjae’s long eyes curved slightly as his gaze softened.

“What else… Quit your part-time job soon? Move out of the dorm?”

Seoyoon’s tension evaporated in an instant. Without realizing it, he had been so tense that his hands tingled from the strain.

“That’s it?”

“Want me to say more? I’ll make sure to get everything you want.”

Woo Yeonjae laughed and asked teasingly. Only when Seoyoon saw his usual playful smile did his heart finally settle down. It seemed the subtle tension he’d noticed in Woo Yeonjae recently had all been in his head.

“Are you a kid? Begging like that?”

“Why not? I’m serious.”

Woo Yeonjae smirked mischievously, then narrowed his eyes as if calculating something.

“Did you ask me that because you had something to say?”

“No, it’s nothing.”

Moon Seoyoon quickly dismissed the idea.

“Seems like you do.”

As Woo Yeonjae lifted his head off the sofa, his body naturally shifted, and his knee brushed against Seoyoon’s bare skin again.

Seoyoon repeated his denial.

“I told you, it’s nothing.”

It couldn’t be.

It had to be nothing.

Even though he kept repeating that to himself, his heart continued to race, as if he had been caught doing something wrong.